I know I'm not the only one who gets stressed around the holidays right?
Seriously though, ever since I was a little girl the holidays (particularly my birthday and Christmas) have given me major anxiety. More than 75% of Xmas's have resulted in me bawling my eyes out on Christmas Eve.
I'm such a big baby.
So, why the freak outs?
Well, I've done a little soul searching and I think my holiday crazies are caused by several things:
1. I'm naturally an anxious, worry-prone person. Always have been, probably always will be. I was that 5 year old kid who wouldn't go in the McDonald's ball pit because I was convinced I'd get some disease. I was that 14 year old teenager who had mini panic attacks before midterms, and I'm the 24 year old woman who still can't handle the holidays.
2. Holidays/birthdays/graduation/parties/anything I'm extra excited for makes me extra stressed. I always want everything to be perfect, and create all sorts of ridiculous expectations and then obsess over making them happen/freaking out when they don't. The more happy and thrilled I am about something, the more likely I am to go all crazy bitch on you or anyone unfortunate enough to be near me. Heaven help everyone on my wedding day...
3. I definitely feed off of the emotions/actions/reactions of everyone around me, including complete strangers. And since I'm clearly not the only one freaking out around the holidays, the constant buzz of anxiety rippling through the population makes me nutty. And if someone dares to cut me off in traffic, give me a dirty look, say anything even slightly rude to me, etc. etc., I'm in ruins for the rest of the day.
Okay, so I'm overly sensitive, easily stressed, and not totally sane. But I'm also determined, passionate, and not totally sane. So - this year - I refuse to let numbers 1 through 3 and the holiday hecticness get the better of me.
Here are four things to ease the anxiety - if you're anything like me, try one or all of these!
1. I'm making a conscious effort to stay positive. If someone flips me the bird at a red light, I'm going to laugh it off, turn up my music, and move on. If my car gets hit in the middle of the night (yes, this happened), I'm going to be thankful I wasn't in it and move on.
2. I've always hated when people tell me, "Just stop worrying!" Anyone who's a worrier knows that is the most pointless advice ever. Trust me, if I could 'just stop worrying,' I would! So I'm embracing the fact that, yeah, I'm prone to anxiety and meltdowns. That's okay. If, for some reason, I don't manage to stay positive or end up having a panic attack, I am not going to beat myself up over it.
3. I'm going to drink a bunch of chamomile tea so I can calm the F&%K DOWN!
4. And, finally, I'm going to do things that make me happy. I'm going to spend time with the people I love, eat sushi and drink sake on Christmas eve, treat myself to a new pair of Victoria's Secret sweatpants, dance around to Beyonce's new album, get a winter manicure, snuggle my stuffed animals, and have way too many peppermint mochas.
I love the holidays, I really, truly do. Sometimes they lead to tears, stress, and sleepless nights, but I always end up having a wonderful, super fabulous time. And this year I'm determined to have the best Christmas ever by staying positive, accepting that I'm worry-prone (and that this isn't something to be ashamed of!), drinking tea, and having tons of fun!
I hope everyone is having a wonderful Christmas Eve's Eve!